Fast Forward Button Please

It’s been a long while since I have enjoyed life… and by enjoy I highly define it as unwinding and stress relieving activities such as trips, bar hopping, outing and movie tripping. I have been on the rocks for almost a year now since that dreaded and unforgettable days of 2012. I quit my previous work in Cebu with the hopes of finishing my education and hoping to get that diploma in BS Psychology. I’m no longer young and I aint getting any younger. So I felt that unnecessary pressure and enrolled myself last year. I’m now on my last term. A dreadful term so to say… because of juggling work, studies and thesis. I would consider myself blessed because I get to wake up everyday and still have the chance to breathe to the very least. 

Everyone knows who I am and my life is definitely an open book – I do have secrets but the rest is like Kris Aquino’s life were everyone gets a chance to judge me. DUHH! I don’t really care. Haha. Moving forward though, I work in the evening and I work because I got bills to pay and rent along with my massive desire for food plus to provide for my family which is my sister and kid. Joseph is my partner and he had been very helpful with that but I really don’t push him to do so as it is not his responsibility. Still, I thank him for being there.

Now, my challenge is, due to my unexplainable brilliance (hahaha sorry!) a lot of employers come to me. With my need for money (we all need it.. :p), I kind of accepted some of them so I do multitask. Just imagine that on a daily basis. Unfortunately, my brain works twice its supposed capacity. I find it unfortunate because having too much knowledge pains the structure of my life – I would rather be ignorant at some point. So I work in the evening, sleep for 6 – 7 hours or 3 hours when I had my OJT and then wake up and cook for the fam. This has been my daily routine since April 2013. It’s been 5 months now and I guess I have survived. Im amazed by this because I thought I would never ever survive. I doubt you can! Hahaha.

Moving forward though, the reason why I’m ranting as hell here, because all I want to say is I NEED A BREAK! I just want to get that lovely 8 hours sleep and then run maybe or play basketball (which I couldn’t do anymore…). I would love to play with my kid but I can’t seem to give him that. I play with boyfriend though (hahahaha…) but still my kid understands and even tells me I need to sleep. 

Im thinking otherwise, is it break that I need or a fast forward button so that I can move forward to ending the term and finally breathing some real air after the exhaustion of being a working – mom – student – girlfriend – sister – provider. 

Well… What do you think? Let me know. 




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